NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL SPOTLIGHT #6

Check out the beautiful Marlo...she's natural and loving it. Love the curls!

My Natural Hair Journey:

 I had been getting relaxers since I was 4 or  5. My earliest memories of my hair was it always being super thick unmanageable and my mother always wanting to keep it braided up and not deal with it. I hated getting my hair done. The sitting, the pulling, and the burning! I hated it!  She on the other hand had beautiful natural hair. So easy and free. Most of the women of the women in family had beautiful natural hair. My mother kept her hair short and colored but she never wore it relaxed. I loved her hair. I always wished I had hair like hers, but I was convinced that I had "bad hair" so I never thought I could be natural. My relaxed hair was never severely damaged or anything, but It never really grew longer than my shoulders, and I always had a dry and itchy scalp, especially during the winter.

How long have you been natural, and what made you decide to go natural?

My stylist in Houston took awesome care of my relaxed hair, but I spent hours in the salon, and avoided all extracurricular activities to keep it beautiful.   When I moved to the Dallas area, I started to go to a new stylist and she kept telling me I didn't really need a relaxer if I wanted to transition out of it. Every time I would come in to get my hair done she would ask me when I would be ready to take it out. I knew that my relaxer was keeping me from doing things that I needed to do, or wanted to do so, finally I told her when I turned thirty, and I would do it.  And I did just that.  I did the Big Chop in Jan. of 2008!

Were your friends/family supportive? If not, how did you overcome the negativity?

The first day was kind of crazy! My twin boys burst out in tears as soon as they saw me. They said I looked like a boy, and were truly upset with me. One of my boys was begging me to wear a wig, because he didn't want anyone to see me! I was hurt!  My husband was a little shocked, but more curious of what I was going to do with it. Most of my friends and family were supportive, but you always get someone that is old school and thinks it’s just nappy! Which is fine, not everyone will like it or understand it? My twins love my hair now and they always want to touch it and play in it. I guess it has the same effect on my hubby too. Come to think of it, it has the same effect on strangers too!!!

What is your current hair routine?

 In the winter months I wear a lot of two stand twists and twist outs using vegetable glycerin, Shea butter, and IC fantasia gel. Now that it is warm I will do a wash and go with Kinky Curly products or Curly Magic by Uncle Funky's Daughter Products. I refresh my curls with Taliah Waajid Bodifier Mist. I wash my hair with Herbal Essence Hello Hydration once a month and co wash bi weekly with Knot today.

Do you have any hair goals?

I had a hair goal in the beginning, which was to grow it past my shoulders. My hair surpassed that goal within the first year. Now it is to just keep it as healthy as I can. Learn as much as I can about my hair and find new ways to manipulate my curls.

Is there anything else you would like to share?

The one thing I would like people to know about natural hair is that it is so versatile! It can do so much, if you just take the time to learn what it can do. Some ladies might try it and give up within a few month of going natural, but I encourage these ladies to be patient! Give yourself time to grow! Give your hair time to grow! This is a true journey and you have to respect it! Learn to love the real you!

Trying something new...

I'm a neutral type of girl.
This past week I wanted to try a RED lip... so I pulled out my red lipsticks, red liner, exfoliated my lips (essential), watched a few YouTube tutorials, and got up the nerve to do it.

Soo what do you think? I loved it, My mom loved it, my sister...no so much, my daddy is easy, so he was cool either way.

Here are a few tips on achieving the perfect red lip.


1. EXFOLIATE YOUR LIPS
This is a good practice for your lips periodically anyway, but be sure to exfoliate before you do a red lip, especially with a matte color. I used MAC Ruby Woo. DEFINITELY Matte.

There is nothing worse than crusty red lips.. : /

2. Watch a tutorial
Just for good measure, you don't want to dive off into the deep end without knowing what you are doing. Here is one of my favorite red lip tutorials...

3. Line your lips first

Lining your lip will allow your color to be as defined and vibrant as possible and will minimize smearing. (Who wants red teeth?)

So that was my walk on the wild side. lol

Why Don’t Black Women Support Each Other In The Workplace?

Good Morning!

So this article really hit home for me. I had an issue with this as recent as yesterday. UGH!

 

Rene Styler of Good Enough Mother writes:

 

I was talking to a good friend the other day when she asked me something that really threw me for a loop. I guess I thought, having achieved the level of success she has in her corporate career, she was immune to this trend. Maybe I thought because she wasn’t in TV, these issues didn’t pertain to her. But it was clear to me how wrong I was when Tracy took a deep breath and asked me, “Why don’t black women support each other?” Oh dear.

Tracy is thin, attractive, whip smart and graduated from a big name school near the top of her class. Warm, inviting, generous to a fault, she never met someone she wasn’t willing to give a fair shake to. But the pain in her voice was evident when she detailed how most of the relationships she’s experienced with other African American women in the working world, had been adversarial. And, as much as I hate to admit it, I understand. I really, REALLY do.

I remember early in my career, coming into a TV station where there was a well established, older, African American woman on staff. I had heard so much about her and was very much looking forward to learning from her. She, however, wanted noting to do with me. The benign neglect would have been one thing; the truly heartbreaking aspect was when I’d catch her with a scowl on her face as she was looking in my direction or the times she gave cub reporters, mostly men and some white women, detailed instruction on how to get better but could only manage remarks to me through her clenched teeth. I finally gave up but never forgot that experience, which is why I go overboard to share what I know with anyone who asks.

When I told my work hubby, Richard about Tracy’s experiences and my own, he was aghast. As a gay man, working in media, he’s constantly telling me about the “Gay Mafia” who look out for each other, alerting each other of upcoming projects and in general supporting one another. And it’s not just gay men; it’s common with other ethnic groups as well. Even African American men support each other more or, at the very least, are not actively undermining those they work with.

Knowing the “what” doesn’t make the “why” any clearer, but if I had to guess the cause of this trend I would think it’s rooted in two things. The first is the “only room for one” phenomenon, the idea that whatever the field, it’s a zero sum game and another woman of color is competition.

The other factor, and I HATE to admit this, is that women are catty. I’m not perfect and have to say I’ve been guilty of this bad habit myself at times. It’s far easier to tear another woman down, leaving you the last one standing, than to link arms with her and work together to make a real difference.

But the big issue I have with this alarming trend is that it targets the wrong people for blame. Shouldn’t we as black women be working together to make sure someone who looks like us, in gender and hue, gets the corner office? Wouldn’t that help the effort to get more representation among the people who do the hiring? And wouldn’t it be great if we learned to celebrate each other’s successes, confident that what we give, we get and at some point someone would be doing the same for us?

Alas, based on information I found out recently, I’m not sure how close we are to actually achieving that utopia. In the meantime, I’ll continue to do what I always have, offer support to those who ask, unconcerned with the false thinking that it weakens my position. Because the truth is, working together strengthens us as a whole. United we can move mountains.

Okay so I’m curious, if you are a black woman, what’s been your experience with other black female co-workers? Do you feel in constant competition? Do you think this is a phenomenon that other women in the workplace experience? Why do you think that is? Fire away!

NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL SPOTLIGHT #5

If you need some natural inspiration! Check out my pretty friend Adrienne! Gorgeous hair!! Beautiful person!
Enjoy!

Tell us a little bit about you and your natural journey?

I decided to transition my relaxed hair into its natural state in May of 2009. At first it started off as a personal challenge to myself, to see if I could really do it. My hair had been relaxed since the age of 5. I was too scared to start off with the big chop so I decided to transition instead. I got braids, weaves, and tried transitional styles such as the twist-n-curl for a full year while drastically cutting my ends between each hairdo.

How long have you been natural, and what made you decide to go natural ?

After transtioning  for a complete year, I decided it was time to cut off all the relaxed hair and become completely natural. So I can say the full journey has been atleast 2 years. After  chopping off relaxed hair I could tell the condition of my hair was healthier than I have ever seen it, so I decided to keep going. I never  thought I could feel so liberated just by becoming NATURAL!

Were your friends and family supportive ?   If not, how did you overcome the negativity?

Most of my friends and my hubby were very supportive and a big encouragement. Family was a different story. One of my family members flat out told me, to take that @#%! out of my head, he didn’t like it. Each time he would see me it would be the same reaction, “I like your hair the other way!”  I expected the funny looks, and comments, and  a million questions. WHY WHY WHY? My response to the negativity was WHY NOT? You really have to have tough skin. The reality was I loved it and that is all that mattered, it wasn’t for anyone else but me to understand.

What is your current hair routine?

It took a while for me to find products that I love, but that was my fault because I still change up my hairstyles often. But while in my natural state, I use Cantu Shea Butter Leave In Conditioner, and I wash my hair with Taliaah Waajid products. I am still in the learning stages, but I have learned to twist my hair at night to get the “big hair” effect. Youtube and one of my closest friends Carnisha D. have helped me learn how to manage my hair.

Do you have any hair goals?

My goal is to keep going and keep my hair as healthy as possible.

Finish this statement: I love being natural because...

Because it has a deeper meaning than just sporting a big fro, it has allowed me to tap into my natural inner beauty as well which in turn has boosted my confidence, self-esteem, and self-worth. I love the way I see myself from my own point of view.

Is there anything else you would like to say and where can we keep up with you? FB, Twitter, blog, etc....

On my FB page, I currently have a photo album titled “In the Key of A Natural”, where I have documented some of my journey using photos.

God did it!

God is so good! My mom invited me to speak at her quarterly prayer breakfast this past Saturday. It was a wonderful, beautiful, sweet event. You would have had to be there to understand why I describe the event that way. There was such a sweet, spirit in the building and everyone genuinely seemed glad to be there. I was pretty nervous because the Lord lead me to speak about my journey with him over the last few weeks and it has been…in a nutshell...a bit shaky. I believe the Lord put me in the way of some very beautiful people and I am sooooo grateful. Each one of the speakers had a message that spoke to me in a very real and personal way.

I will share more on that another day but I wanted to share some of the pictures from the event.



Me, Shavonn Cumby (Psalmist) , Kim Bady (Speaker), Cynthia Patterson (Speaker) , Yolanda Carroll (Hostess/Mommy)





Kim Bady...What a JEWEL!!



My Grandmother's table

Looks like I'm saying something good> :)



Me and my pretty mommy





I <3 THIS PICTURE!!
My Mom, Auntie, and Grandmother





My girl Shavonn took us into worship!




Our table, smiling EARLY!




5 minute face. Gorg!




Waiting for the raffle winner




a few naturals :) at the event





Author of book "It Had To Happen" Cynthia Patterson



All photographs taken by Jason Walton Photography

I'm feeling cute...

Well it was one of those days...
Hair acting right, makeup came out cute, outfit cute!!
Just thought I'd share! :)

 

NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL SPOTLIGHT #4

It's time again for another Naturally Beautiful Spotlight! When I say Beautiful, I meant it!! I have been blessed to feature some really gorgeous ladies. :)

Take a look at the Fabulous La'Reecia!!

Tell us a little bit about you and your natural journey?

 Well I am a laid back free spirited kind of person. The smallest things generally make me happy. Anything dealing with the nature and water relaxes me. I have been getting relaxers since I was a young girl due to the fact that my mom didn't like tackling my curls. Although the relaxer never fully straighten my hair it made it more manageable. I started embracing my natural hair as an adult and started my journey a year ago. My hair is half and half right now. Although sometimes it's a bit frustrating dealing with the two textures, I have not committed to doing the BC because my husband loves to play in my hair. I am gradually cutting my relaxed ends as my curls work their way out. Once me hair reaches a good length that I am comfortable with I will make a full transition.

How long have you been natural/transitioning, and what made you decide to go natural ?

I have been transitioning for 1 year now. My daughter inspired me to go back natural. She and I have very similar textures of hair and I adore her curls. I was instantly motivated to give my natural hair a chance!

Were your friends and family supportive ?  

 If not, how did you overcome the negativity? My mom was very excited to hear about my decision. She actually loves my curls! She likes it wild and big. It was always my decision to continue to relax my hair due to wanting my hair long and straight. My husband is all for my decision he really hasn't expressed his thoughts except, he LOVES long hair. His feelings is why I am choosing to transition instead of going through with the BC.

What is your current hair routine?

I was at least once a week and co wash in between depending on how much product buildup. After wash/co wash I double strand twist and add a roller at the ends to give the remaining relaxed ends a curl. If I'm going to bed I sleep with a satin bonnet and let my hair air dry. In the morning I remove rollers and unwind twist. Add a little Shea Moisture to my hair. Shake and Go!!!


Do you have any hair goals?

Long luxurious curls, curls, curls!!!


Finish this statement: I love being natural because...

It gives me the freedom and flexibility to wear my hair the way I choose instead of being conformed to just one style!

Is there anything else you would like to say? 

 I am truely excited about my hair journey! Every week brings new excitement for me...

Girls day!

The weather has been absolutely beautiful this week so me , my daughter, my grandmother, and my sister took some time to hang out on the porch. We decided to do an impromtu photoshoot. Here are the pics... Isn't my grandmother gorg? She's 75! :)




4 generations, minus my mom

 



My Grandmother and daughter Bailey







My sweetie :)

 

Me and sis, feeling cute



Sis and Grandmother





3 girls



NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL SPOTLIGHT #3

Meet our Naturally Beautiful Spotlight of the week, my friend, the gorgeous Danielle. :)

Tell us a little bit about you and your natural journey?

My name is Danielle and this is second time on my natural journey. I caved in to what society wanted me to look like "The Black Barbie" with long silky hair. The second time around I did a transition for about 4 months and made the Big Chop and I LOVE my natural hair!

How long have you been natural, and what made you decide to go natural ?

My natural journey was all about starting a new chapter in my life. I cut so much negative energy out of my life and my natural journey was a symbol for me of out with the old in with the new.

Were your friends and family supportive ?   If not, how did you overcome the negativity?

My family and friends were not supportive of my decision at first they felt like I made a mistake. My mom feels like a woman's hair is her crown and glory and I chopped all of mine off she was devastated. I am thankful for the few friends that I have that were a year ahead of me in their natural journey. They were my true support system and helped me through the first 6 months. They taught me what to buy, how to style my hair, EVERYTHING!!!!

What is your current hair routine?

I am a wash and go girl right now because my hair is still short. So I wash my hair once a week and do a deep conditioner. I then condition my hair and put my curling gel on my hair (a lot) and it will keep my hair curly for the week. I just have to dampen my hair with water from my spray bottle to liven up my curls in the morning.

Do you have any hair goals?

I love having long hair so I plan to let my hair grow out for about five years and have crazy length.

Finish this statement: I love being natural because...

I love being natural because I am able to see the real me!

Is there anything else you would like to say and where can we keep up with you? FB, Twitter, blog, etc...

Being natural is beautiful and I was nervous about how it would be perceived but I feel great and Love it!

Mia Amber Davis, Rest In Peace

Hi, (Sigh)
One of my favorite Plus Size models/actresses has passed away. Mia Amber Davis was only 31 years old. That is sad... I pray she was saved, and is now in a better place.

Here is a tribute to the beauty in pictures. 

Texture and typing

I have had a few people tell me that they would wear their hair natural if they had hair like me (what does that mean). I am saddened by this comment because it seems like some black women are finding yet another way to separate ourselves from one another. Light skinned, dark skinned, short hair, long hair, big booty, no booty, straight, curly....and you get the point. Why not celebrate our diversity, rather than let it be another way for us to separate ourselves. ..
(rant over)
So when people ask me my hair type, I sometimes draw a blank because I struggle with the hair typing system. Simply because I have so many different textures in my head. My hair is just curly, kinky if you ask me. It's downright stubborn in the crown if you really want to get specific. ANYWAY, I took some pictures while wet with no product. You be the judge.
See ya!

My Michael Jackson curl :)

NATURALLY BEAUTIFUL SPOTLIGHT #2

It's time again for our Naturally Beautiful Spotlight...Meet my friend, Jaime!

1. Tell us a little bit about you and your natural journey?

My name is Jaime and my hair has always been a big part of my life. Most people determine your ethnicity by the texture of your hair so I have been everything from Puerto Rican, Indian, Biracial, etc. I am here to tell you I am black, and my mama dad are black!  Black women CAN have beautiful hair too. I love my hair and although I have a lot of it I never know what to do with it on many occasions. People tell me that they wish they had hair like mine, my response "You don't have to comb this every morning!" (Smiles)

2. How long have you been natural, and what made you decide to go natural ? 

I have been "natural" for the past 15 years. I haven't had a relaxer since my freshman year in high school. A few bad beauty shop visits and I decided I wanted to be curly.

3. Were your friends and family supportive ?   If not, how did you overcome the negativity?

Very supportive most of the women in my family are "naturals".

4. What is your current hair routine?

I like to wear my hair straight so I wash once a week, let it air dry in a pony tail for a day and either curl it with the curling iron while it is curly or flat iron it. I wear it curly mostly in the summer, because I leave the house when it is still wet. I use Pantene (the brown bottle) and just leave in the conditioner, shake dry with a towel, comb through finger poof and go LOL!

5. Do you have any hair goals?

I want to try color. I haven't had color for over 10 years, I think I am scared because my hair is SO black and I love the color now just want something new and funky!

6. Finish this statement: I love being natural because...

I never have to sit for 4+ hours in a beauty shop again (unless I want too)!

7. Is there anything else you would like to say and where can we keep up with you? FB, Twitter, blog, etc....

You can follow me on my blog at http://maketheselbsdisappear.blogspot.com/